the weblog of Alan Knox

I’m not really here

Posted by on Mar 27, 2010 in church life, love, service | 1 comment

I haven’t seen T. in several weeks. T. lives in “The Neighborhood.” We met here a couple of years ago when we started spending time there.

She’s been having problems with her teeth for a long time. Although she’s been to the dentist over and over again, they keep putting off doing anything about it. For instance, once she called the dentist, and he told her that everything was ready. When she got there, everything wasn’t ready. And, she’s still waiting.

Recently, things have gotten worse. And, she’s very self-conscious about it. She’s asked me not to come by to visit her until she gets some of her teeth fixed. So, we just talk on the phone.

Today, when I was taking her neighbor’s garbage out, I noticed that T.’s door was open. On the way back, I knocked on her door. When I heard her coming, I told her it was me, but that I wasn’t going to stay.

I said, “We don’t have to talk. I just wanted to say hello.”

By that time, she had opened the door, and I hugged her. I simply said, “I love you and miss you, and I just wanted to let you know.”

As I turned to leave, she said thank you and that she missed me, too.

Sometimes, when you can’t really be there, a hug says alot.


One Comment

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  1. 3-27-2010

    You know, Alan, your final sentence could mean a lot of different things in different contexts. Think of those times when you’re not really present. Your mind and heart is so consumed with whatever it is consumed with and it keeps you from being “here.” It is in those moments that a hug from another can really mean so much!